Things That I Hate

People Who Read Fast Food Menus After Waiting In Line 10 Minutes

Your eyesight cannot possibly be so fickle that moving two feet forward makes the board easier to see. The reason I can’t just order what I knew I wanted before I left the car is because of people like you. And besides, the menu has been pretty much the same for the last twenty five years you’ve been coming here, hasn’t it? I’m pretty sure if there is something new it will be surrounded by big flashy lights and a sign saying “Order, this lemmings!” that you’ll be able to see from half a block away.

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