Annoying Students

Students think way too highly of themselves. I’m sick of hearing them whine about how authoritarian their teachers are.

DUH! It’s probably got to do with the fact that they’re in charge! (A very mild statement compared to what I’d really say to them.) I mean, of course your teacher isn’t going to always be a 24-year old bro who likes Sublime. There are conservative people out there who expect you to behave normally. Deal with it, because after you graduate when you complain about your boss they’ll just fire you.

Don’t even bother complaining about homework either. Nobody cares that your weekend got spoiled by a few assignments. You can get drunk next weekend if it matters that much to you. I worked every weekend in school and it’s really not that bad being sober enough to spell your own name.

Finally, when you’re out in public (especially in groups), do me a favor and shut up. If I’m sitting at the bus stop leave me alone, don’t start yelling about how much you like dogs more than cats and your 63 great reasons why, and please stop acting like college is so difficult. Because once you get away from mom and dad’s money, get your own place and start doing it on your own, you’ll wish you were back in the dorm eating those sixteen-cent packages of noodles. Anyway, I know you don’t really understand how annoying you are yet, but wait a couple years and look back at it, trust me.