Things That I Hate

Girls Who Say They Can Get Someone Else to Beat You Up

I’m a girl, so I’m not being sexist. I can fight my own battles and have some good comebacks, but most of the trendy, fake girls need nail polish and a bodyguard. It’s true. I was at the pool just today and there were these two girls that claimed they were birth sisters, a blond with blue eyes and a brunette with brown eyes. They were around seven, and said they had another sister that was four days older than me, so I said, “well then I’m younger and quicker”. They told me I was wrong. Then I told them I could beat them up in a second and that I’m a blue belt in karate and that I play football with all the guys, plus I’m a swimmer that can break out of police handcuffs, which I got from my neighbor who is a former policeman, and I’m the toughest skateboarder on my block, and they said, “So? Our sister’s older than you by four whole months!” I laughed my head off. I said, “look, I can just stand here and beat you up, but you need to grab a pretend sister that you claim is older than me, but she could be weaker, if you were in trouble, you’d have to whip out your phone, where I could knock you out in run.” They left. They should toughen up if they want to talk like that.


  1. This entire post made me want to drown myself in battery acid. Are you trolling, or just stupid?

    • by wowzers
    • 11 April 2011, 6:18 PM

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